More Randomness (and some rantings)

I have decided that, as tasteless and boring as they are, I am going to bring frozen dinners to work for lunch. My New Year's resolutions (shocking and orginal) were to eat better, get in shape, and save more money. This may surprise you, as it did me, but eating at the delis downstairs everyday, some times 2x a day, is actually NOT helping me accomplish any of those goals. Weird right? I know!

Also weird, sympathy bad moods. I was in, I am not going to lie and call it great mood, but a non-existent, vanilla mood this morning. Then I talked to Blaze and she seemed not herself (I also call emailing talking... don't judge me!). So I read her blog... Apparently she is in a bad mood, even though she says she has no reason to be in a bad mood. Now I find myself not in a good mood, and what some might call, a bad mood. I think it is a sympathy bad mood. Is that possible? Weird? Creepy? I think all of the above qualify.

Spoiler Alert: Project Runway finale was last night. Least shocking finale since, um, ever: Christen wins. Maybe I am not as fashionable as I think. Maybe I can't stand to hear a whiny, gay, tiny person (notice i am NOT using the word man here) say something about how fabulous, or fierce (cringe) he and his designs are. Nor can I tolerate other people using it like it is a now acceptable term. Kuddos to Posh for keeping to Major instead of Fierce. I am not saying that the other designers were better, even though i liked more of their pieces... I think more I just didn't want him to win and have to hear about his fierceness...

Last thought for now... We have these new snack things in the kitchen. Even though I don't like spicey things, I tried one. I will refrain from using the name, because it is my understanding that some people like these. Here is my thought about them. They taste like BO smells. Even the aftertaste lingers like BO. I swear on everything holy, it tastes like you have licked the armpit of someone strongly opposed to bathing or wearing deodorant. Let me know if you figure out what I am talking about. And if you do, I apologize in advance.

Mother in Laws... Creatures from the Black Lagoon??

I have been thinking about Mother-In-Laws alot lately. Maybe it is because mine is in town visiting my not-so-new house anymore for the first time, or because it seems that no one, no matter how sane she was when the kids were dating, has a sane mother-in-law. Honestly, mine went nutso. I am not kidding! But going into all of that is an entirely different blog!

There are 2 other girls I work with who have crazy mother-in-laws, and it seems that they all have friends whose MIL are crazy too. I don't really understand how their kids deciding to get married makes them literally go insane. I am vowing here and now to try my darnedest NOT to go crazy when my kids get married. Because you are all reading this, it is now your job to remind me of this vow when I start to slip. Blaze and I have decided to write ourselves letters to read when we are older to remind ourselves what to do and what not to do.

Here are a few suggestions (learned from experience and stories others have told me):

1. Don't, under any circumstances, register or change the registry for your children. If they registered for it, there has to be a reason. And it doesn't matter why they want it, they do. If you don't agree with it, don't buy it for them! If they have made some horrible GRAVE mistake, you may mention it in passing that you were looking through the list to get some ideas what you wanted to get them and noticed that they are registered for 3 different sets of China or twin sheets... And most of all, do not critique what they registered for. Just because it isn't your style doesn't mean it is ugly!
2. Do tell the bride how beautiful she is and is going to be in her dress every time she mentions it. This is especially true for Mothers of the Bride. I get it - not everyone is into weddings and wedding dresses - understandable. And even if you think the bride isn't one of those people, we still expect it. In our heads, it is what is supposed to happen. I don't care if you have to pull out a nose hair to make yourself tear up! Show an emotion! Fake enthusiasm.
3. Just because you are paying for it, does not actually in fact mean that it is YOUR wedding. You don't get to pick the colors, or the flowers, or the attendants, or really, anything. You may certainly have an opinion, and are more than welcome to give it when asked for it. You are not, however, allowed to give it to us and expect us to take it as gospel, or tell us our different opinion is wrong. Unless you are 1 of the 2 people standing at the front, your opinion is just that - your opinion.
4. Do remember what you learned in kindergarten. "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."
5. Don't expect to have a mother-daughter relationship with you DIL the day she gets engaged. She has a mother-daughter relationship with her mother based on years of love and fights and learning to put up with the other. We are close to our moms because she put up with us between the ages of 12 and 18. You haven't put in your time yet.
6. You don't like other people cleaning your house or organizing your house when you didn't ask them. Why would you do it for your DIL?! What you are saying to her is: "You are not keeping my sons house the way I would, or good enough. You are a bad wife." Even if that is what you are thinking (and shame on you for thinking it!) don't act on it. Please refer to #4. Actions speak louder than words. You don't want someone going through your stuff. Even if it is intended to help and be a nice gesture, fight the urge!
7. Don't ask when you are going to have grandchildren. Most likely, you are going to get them... Don't push.
   
8. Don't ask what we did on our honeymoon, and more importantly DON'T under ANY circumstances, go through our camera or picture folders with out us there and without our permission! Unless you are an idiot, you have a pretty good idea of what we spent most of our time doing on the honeymoon, which is why you shouldn't look at the pictures unless we show them to you. Trust me on this one, it can lead to no good.

I am thinking about writing a book, like "Idiots Guide to Being a new Mother-In-Law". If you have any Do and Don't's or just a funny story, send it my way :)